Can’t quite do it yet. . .clean the window. We lost Abby in March of this year and it’s one of those things I feel that if I wipe those shmoo marks away, another part of her is erased. Maybe it sounds silly, but I can’t get those back again once they’re gone. I don’t know – I may keep them, and they could still be there when it’s our time to leave.
Do you ever have feelings like that? Little pieces that are hard to let go when a loved one or pet dies. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, unless like in this case, you’re a clean freak (which clearly, I’m not) and need to have everything spotless. So, here they are on the sliding glass door below and on the one upstairs.
I know one day, they’ll be washed off, and gone. It still won’t take away the wonderful memories we had with her over the 14-¾ years she was with us. A part of her will always be with us, whether the marks remain on the windows or not – shmoo stay as long as you want!
That’s life, though, the big things and the little things. All of it! Some tug at your heart and are deep and others surface that you barely notice. I wouldn’t trade any of it as it makes me feel alive . . . connected to a bigger existence.
Sometimes, I wish I understood those things I feel but can’t see. I know something is there. Hubby said he was halfway asleep and dreaming the other night, when he noticed Abby come running into the bedroom and jump up with her front paws on the side of the bed – then she was gone. A brief moment between 2 worlds.
Another day of living and reflecting, that’s the beautiful thing of this life. We all have these many moments throughout our day. Sometimes we pause to notice and other times we barely have time to breathe let alone stop and feel moments. I get it. But, maybe in reading this it will give you a pause long enough to pump the brakes and just breathe to take it all in.
Thank you for reading and spending your time with me over here.
Pat at the ‘ol kitchen table
